Finding a sense of internal worthiness

Finding a sense of internal worthiness

In a society that is focused on the achievement of material possession, the presentation of perfection and success, we tend to think that if we will get as much or better than what we have, then we will be happy or we will be worthy. Achieving a goals set such as a huge house, expensive car or a higher status, people’s adoration, may lead to temporary happiness. The emptiness will eventually creep in again and as a reaction a higher goal or standard will be set.

Why? Because it is never enough. You may think ‘’if I will get or be X then I will really belong or I will be loved’’. The problem is that your worthiness depends on external factors.  The loss or failure will lead to feelings of worthlessness again.

How to change that?

By accepting that you have a right to be yourself, take space, speak up and be loved for whom you are. It starts with you. Be there for yourself when times are hard. Just as you would a friend.

The next time that you feel emotional pain do this:

1. Tell yourself its OK to be X ( name the emotion). It is  OK to be imperfect and make mistakes
2. Forgive yourself for your mistakes in that situation and for having imperfections. You can even say the actual words to yourself or write them down.  
3. Sooth yourself- do whatever makes you feel better.

Connect with people, who love you for who you are. Their love can remind you of your worthiness. Talking with them can offer you a rational perspective and/or remind you of the parts of yourself, which you have been ignoring, neglecting, or underestimating.