Asking for support when you feel ashamed or embarrassed about how you feel

You may have grown up hearing bite the bullet, don’t be weak and carry on. Sharing your emotional pain may be a taboo in your culture. You may have noticed that others are being judged, criticized, or even rejected after they have shared their mental problems. This might stop you from becoming vulnerable and asking for social and emotional support when you need it the most. Being more open does not mean that you need to disclose everything and to everyone. But daring to share your feelings with an selected few whom you know, trust and who care about, can give you the support, positive energy and encouragement that you need to heal.

Before you choose to share, especially when you feel anxious of becoming vulnerable, prepare yourself:

1. Think about what you want to share and with whom.
2. Choose a day, time and place where you feel comfortable and safe. It is wise to take such a step on your better days. Communicates to the other person that you might cancel if you do not feel good that day. That way no one will be disappointed in you.
3. You might want to prepare beforehand. Think how you want to formulate your sentences. The message you want to convey or the request you want to make. You may want to write it down or rehearse so you will feel more confident. Prepare for all possible reactions, such as what you will say if they want to give you advice, but they are not listening to you. Or, if they are being judgmental. Remind yourself that it is a poor reflection on them, not on you and that you deserve support and love regardless of what that person may think.
4. Congratulate yourself on having the courage to share and ask for social support.